September 06, 2004

Encounter Weekend

I'm sorry that I haven't posted in awhile. I have been on a weekend trip with ladies from our church, South Georgia, Arizona, Alabama, and Israel. Isn't that an interesting group of people to bring together? It's amazing how we can all come together as sisters in the name of Christ no matter what our skin color or our background and love each other. That is the way that it should be all of the time everywhere.

It was a weekend that I will never forget. Though I did not spend the weekend very emotional at all (which is highly unusual for me), or have any fireworks go off like I had hoped for (and was beginning to think that I had wasted my time) I ended up knowing why the Lord pushed me to go.

Before I left, I knew that I knew that there was a God and there was no turning back on that. I was at a point with my walk that I was content to be where I was for the most part. I wanted a closer walk with the Lord, but I was completely content to sit back and watch everyone else speak in tongues and the other things. I wanted to dance and get excited more often, excited about what the Lord has done for me but always afraid to get caught up in the emotionalism and hype (as my husband calls it.) Maybe that is why I could not be emotionally moved...because I was set to learn the truth.

It took a while and several people praying for me before I spoke in tongues. When I did, it happened, but it wasn't an emotional thing. I was told that it isn't sometimes and was normal. (This made me feel much better because I had been some before and thought that I must be doing it wrong so I stopped.) by the last session, I was thinking that the leaders must think that I am a dead fish. :o)

We came to the last session which was "The Vision" and we were all supposed to come up and get prayed for to have the vision imparted to us. I went too. Mom came in after it started and said, "What is going on?" I said, "They are making everyone fall down" and I frowned. She laughed and said, "You'd better not...he told you not to fall down." My husband told me not to fall down. I promised that I wouldn't if I could help it at all.

You see, my husband doesn't believe that the Holy Spirit can make you fall. He, being atheist, doesn't believe in the Holy Spirit at all. If you fall down, it is because you have let 'those people at that church' brainwash you and have control of your brain so much that they can manipulate your actions enough to make you fall. I had started believing this because I know how powerful the mind can be. I was going to resist just to prove that I could....I mean, I knew that I could...I hadn't fallen down any of the other times I'd ever been prayed for in the church or there, right?

Mom had said that she was going to sit down because she didn't want to get hurt.Then a few minutes later, she came back and said that she had changed her mind. I didn't question her. Mary came around touching everyone and praying. Most everyone fell at her touch. She got to mom and she fell! She fell! I couldn't believe it! I was thinking that she had sure gotten weak minded in her old age when it felt like I had gotten hit with a bolt of lightening.....I gasped and fell to the floor. I concentrated on the feeling. I wanted to remember what the feeling was like. Then, I tried to get up and I couldn't. I just laid there and wept. My cousin helped me up and it took me a minute to get my balance. I know now what the scripture means when it says, "And be not drunk with wine, wherein is excess; but be filled with the Spirit" and "And Hannah answered and said, No, my lord, I [am] a woman of a sorrowful spirit: I have drunk neither wine nor strong drink, but have poured out my soul before the LORD."

Mom confessed to me on the bus going home that she came back up there because she was upset. She thought that she was pushing people down and she was not going to be satisfied until she saw for herself. I admitted that I thought that I could resist with my mind and we got a good laugh at being taught a lesson over our skepticism by the Holy Spirit.

Posted by Barbara at September 6, 2004 10:21 AM